Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy

* To me, it's a good idea to always carry two sacks of
something when you walk around. That way, if anybody
says, "Hey, can you give me a hand?" You can say, "Sorry,
got these sacks."

* The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth
part of the face.

* If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava,
let'em go, because, man, they're gone.

* If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cut-
ting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time,
for no good reason.

* If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid seeing yourself
in the mirror, because I bet that's what REALLY throws
you into a panic.

* To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music,
no choreography and the dancers hit each other.

* I hope if dogs ever take over the world and they choose
a king, they don't just go by size, because I bet there
are some Chihuahuas with some good ideas.

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