Nuggets of Brilliance

Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever."

--Miss Alabama, in the 1994, Miss USA

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."

-- Mariah Carey

"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life."

-- Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign

"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body."

-- Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward

"Outside of the killings,Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country."

-- Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC

"That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it."

-- A congressional candidate in Texas

"I don't feel we did wrong in taking this great country away from them. There were great numbers of people who needed new land, and the Indians were selfishly trying to keep it for themselves."

-- John Wayne

"Half this game is ninety percent mental."

--Philadelphia Phillies manager, Danny Ozark

"I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix."

-- Dan Quayle

"It's no exaggeration to say that the undecided could go one way or another."

-- George Bush, US President

"We've got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?"

-- Lee Iacocca

"The word 'genius' isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."

-- Joe Theisman, NFL football quarterback & sports analyst

"If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."

-- Bill Clinton, US President

"Traditionally, most of Australia's imports come from overseas."

- Keppel Enderbery

"Your food stamps will be stopped effective March 1992 because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances."

-- Department of Social Services, Greenville, South Carolina