Marriage

* One woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your
wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other replied,
"Well, yes, but I married the wrong man."

* Getting married is very much like going out to a
restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then
when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you
had ordered that.

* Marriage is an institution in which a man loses his
bachelor's degree and the woman gets her master's.

* Young Son: Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts
of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries
her? Dad: That happens in most countries, son.

* A man once said, "I never knew what real happiness was
until I got married; and then it was too late."

* A man took out a classified ad saying "Wife wanted". The
next day he received a hundred responses saying "You can
have mine."

* Some men define marriage as a very expensive way to get
your laundry done free.

* And some learn that the most effective way to remember
your wife's birthday is to forget it once.

* When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you
know that either the wife is new - or the car is.

* Husband: "You know, I was a fool when I married you."
Wife: "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't care!"