1. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic!
Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat
and presto! The blockage will be almost instantly
removed.
2. Are you clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while
slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold
them while you chop away.
3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs about lifting the
toilet seat by simply using the sink.
4. For high blood pressure sufferers: just cut
yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing
the pressure in your veins.
5. A mousetrap, placed on top of your alarm clock,
will prevent you from rolling over and going back to
sleep after you hit the snooze button.
6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of
laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.
7. Have a bad toothache? Smash your thumb with a
hammer and you will forget about the toothache.
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