Hello China & Other Stuff

I have a tool attached to this blog that not only counts the number of visitors but tells me where each is from and how they got here (e.g. via Google, directly or from another website). Amazingly I have a lot of regular visitors from China of all places. TONS of them. So, I wanted to take a moment to welcome those from China. I know their government has a lot of restrictions on Internet viewing so its my great pleasure to know they come here for a little slice of Americana.

Well, here in central Ohio we are entering our third week of subfreezing temps. We had spring for winter until then - should have known winter would show up eventually.

We had our first major snow last week. 4.5" in ten hours. Not the kind of snow that upstate New York has received the last few days - but ours started mid-day and continued falling for ten hours. Getting home from the office was a challenge I stayed an hour late and got home in an hour. Many folks had drives lasting 2-4 hours. The roads were passable the next morning for work. Snow is in the forecast for Monday - upwards of 8" of new snow depending on how the front blows through. I am not scientific enough to figure that out - BUT hope it stays south as is the possibility.

On the upside we are into February already. Spring is close at hand.

I hate my job and am in the process of looking for another. Some of you know I work at a start up company which is part of a large corporation. I am a nurse case manager in a Medicaid HMO. I like what I do - however business has grown so fast and we are simply not staffed to keep up with the pace. It's grueling and is going to get worse. We've gone from 47,000 members when I started about two years ago to around 125,000 to date. I am currently managing nearly 50 inpatients (juggling more like it - in addition to all the other responsibilities I have). To give you an idea of how tough that is - 20 inpatients is really pushing it. The company has taken to buying our lunch since we are usually working through lunch and not taking breaks. I was at work until 9:30 Friday night and went in yesterday for another 4 hours. I get no overtime since I'm salaried. The workers who aren't salaried end up making more money than I do with their overtime. Two nurses quit a week ago - two were out all last week - another is looking and so am I. I've woke up twice in the last week around two am filled with anxiety about work and how was I going to get things done. My mind is racing and I can't go back to sleep - not good.

I did get a lead from one of the folks who quit about a job which would be working from home. I faxed in a resume and they called. I am hoping to meet with them early next week and hoping for the best. Working from home would add a minimum of two hours of ME time to my days since I wouldn't have the commute to and from work. Plus I understand it is significantly more money. As it is now I rarely get home before 7PM and just want to sit and do nothing when I get home because I'm so tired. Takes a lot out of you to get up and go into a job you loathe.

Anyway, enough whining. I am BLESSED to have a job that allows me to take care of myself - and I do love my co-workers. Well, most of them but that's another story.

My son was released from "The Big House" this past Friday. He has been in the county jail in Albuquerque, NM since November after having an altercation with his father. His father got fed up (FINALLY) and pressed charges and no one bailed him out so he's sat there for three months. He was sentenced Friday to time served and released. Now he is truly on his own as he is not allowed to contact his father at all. It is my understanding he is staying with a friend. Well he's 19 and knows every damn thing! Now he'll see how much he doesn't know! He's wanting to come up here and I am very leery of that scenario. I'm afraid he won't leave. I did, after all, throw him out because of his behavior. I like the peace and quite I enjoy right now and intend to keep it that way. He's going to have to learn the hard way since he refused to listen for all these years to the lessons we tried to teach him.

My daughter and her little family are about to move into their first house. It's a rental but it's a house rather than an apartment. They are very excited about the move.

Many of you know I abruptly ended a long term relationship last September after 11 years. That's a really long time. Almost as long as my marriage. I thought I'd be filled with grief and sadness for months on end. Actually that hasn't been the case at all. I've never thought twice about my decision and haven't really shed any tears over it. I've been ok. It's left a huge void - we talked for hours every day - so in that sense the work overload has been a blessing. Hasn't left me much time to think about it. It is what it is.

I've decided to spend the year working on me. I want to focus on two things. Gratitude and forgiveness. Loose some burdens and embrace the present. Seems a wise thing to do.

What will your focus be in 2007? I'd love to know.

Love to all of you!